aarrrgghhhhzzzzz!!!!fuk damn it

chee bye ....hong kan.. damn it.. fuking shit..

frustrated... why i am always not good.. ahhhrrrhrhhhhh fuk...

why cant i be good at at least one thing....

everything is fuking hell lousy... sch work, social skill, talking, even salsa.. basketball..running.. whatever and anything..

firm not firm enough, strict noot strict enough, high pride, yet dun achieve enough... arrrgghhzz.... geeezzzz... #@$#@$@!$@


i really gave up.... i tried very hard on myself.... i tried to be sociable yet it arises words... i tried to score well yet it is always damn lousy... i tried to talk to people yet i am always not good at it... i tried to amend whatever fault and failure yet i always am not able to perfect it...

i cant tell you how frustrated at myself i am... yet i kept on trying.... from now on, i guess i am almost giving up yet my inborn nv say die spirit is pushing me ...but i am not achieving still... 24 years alr...

i am trapped in the middle, in whatever i do.... man not man enough.... half fuk always.. lack of confidence...sissy in short.... damn it...

what shall i do........!!!!!!?????????

i merely need to learn to be beaten by fate?????

i guess.... i am still better off being alone.. live in my own whole .....forever.... why so troublesome need to face all those people words, like how you behave or not or whether how good or bad you dress to occasion??? damn it.... fuk it..... human are never satisfied....

why need to compete... no need.... dun have to fight for whatever you need.. just fail loh... work so hard for disappointment in future for what.

full of disappointing shit in my life.... wanna achieve things sure made rival in no time.... why fight for it.. why cherish it.. fuk care..... why you still wanting to try..... learn and no good just dun care lah...

aarrrrgghhhzzzz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuking damn shit.... who in this whole can understand my frustration? who in this whole knows how sad i am inside and how hard i kept trying to do things.. what you all know about me?? misunderstanding, untrue gossipping.... in short know shit about me.....

who in the whole knows i am actually fuking shy guy.... cares fuking lot for family in silence.... wish to suffer alone than making others unhappy becos of yourself..... trying fuking hard to really treat frds all the same and keep them in my life.... finding someone who really understands me....

whoever is really interested in knowing who i really am?

none.. alll are superficial... judge you by what you seemed to them.... why i spent so much.. for what... damn it...... i been gng out yet i dun feel happy abt it... why? am i trying too hard for frdship that just dun work out..... why i even bother to think of trying to maintain it ....why am i always the person trying when others are not wanting to do anything abt it... why am i so stupid trying to aintain the impossible?

fuk me.. damn me.. what to do ...... arrrgghhhzzzz....

but rest assure.. i will still try to smile..... no one cares about my sadness anyway... who cares... i am just a plain passerby in their life....

have nth for them to use anyway.. good in nth... go away...... doubt i get a gf... dun want to make life miserable for her due to my weakness.... and its not one.. but many...

go away.. dun talk to me when i dun talk to you.. no problem..... just tell me you dun want to be my frd.... why must i face your fakeness if you dun want to be my frd ....

aiya fuk off la.. its ok... we can be stranger its alrite.... i'm weird, bad in everyway... one to be hated... so just fuk off my life....

fuk off!!!!!!