awakening....

came back from hip hop....light heaRTED MOOD...
and when i read back my own post.. while now its calm and when i dun feel like thinking... actually i find that.. why do i insist to find out? i just cant give a damn reason for it..

but stilll i guess it wouldn't die till i really seriously from the bottom of my heart think that it really does not matter anymore..

and looking at my frustration... i am thinking... maybe anger have overcome me again and again... there are bound to be people like that so why make your life miserable? why the anger...

well i guess i am just not happy that i am not able to be the real me again and have to live in life where i created to be in the eye of others just becos of an experiment and a test and try out in doing the abnormal and risk it all...

even when those words that are meant to be kept untold i even try to write it out... sometimes, who do not have evil thoughts or self right thought? but those are just need to be kept to yourself seriously... so why express out when it does not really mean to be anything at all and just wild thinking?

i got to blame myself for that..... so sometimes, there are things that you better not try.... cos it just ruin your life... similiar to theft and murder....

life is a complicated thing...yet if you do everything in the right way and with everyone mentality being nice and right and not expect too much, it can just be simple and easy..

i sincerely hope i will cleanse all hatred and live life as happy as my secondary life again......where i find i am at my most discipline self and best attitude towards life..