deep thought

after moments of considering.... i guess being a self conscious me, i am just punishing myself for my wrongdoings..

you tend to be a shit when your life is in shit situation and people ard you just happen to treat you like shit.... you will be shitty in whatever you do without knowing... probably called fuk up,some people might say...you just dun feel like controlling and do whatever you feel like without bothering anything.. and ends up... i am sure the result is very bad... tarnishing bondage... killing impression...

if you dun trust me, wait till you experience it.... feel it yourself.. and dun forget you once said these words to people and now it might applies to you.. with you and your self right excuses to back up yourself when it happens...

egoistic... thats what is manipulating you...

what turns ard goes ard too.... retribution sure comes... and be sure.. why some of those crooks during your schooling years can turn out to be a nice guy in future.. and looking back, you just cant believe he is so bad then... even him might say his childish then...

there are many things i failed to understand... maybe, its not an area i should touch on until fate have decided that i should know... am not going to be reckless like before... sometimes, time is a good tools in your hand... it gives you preparation before you are ready so you will be able to handle things in future..probably, i am just not ready yet... although i think i am.. fate have decided that i need more time.. thus well should anyone tried to encourage me for some things and i did not do it, i'm sorry i am just listening to what is arranged for me... i'll wait....for the right time for the right thing in the right moment...when everything is right.. even my personality nurtured itself enough to allows it..

sit back and relax and enjoy the show.... its quite a nice phrase to me... sit back, relax and enjoy what life have to give you.... fast forward is not a good thing as you will regret that you never see the details along your way and forced yourself to see the result and making yourself not prepared when the times comes for you to reflect and tell others what you exppereince in your life.. those nitty gritty stuff..even if its written as in a compo, it lack substance as you only know the head and tail but not the body..

be forgiving and forgive others... another nice phrase... you want people to forgive you, you have to first be forgiving... but if you chose to forgive others and yet others chose not to forgive you, they will face their fare share of understanding in future.. life is fair at times..at times ok.. lol ... it make you see what you did to others in a period of time for you to reflect yourself... and maybe things you dun get to understand will be shown to you in a moment of time without you realising its coming...

life is about understanding things too anyway.... things that you do not understand do not mock others when you see it.. or else one day when you get to experience it, you make yourself feel shameful on what you did to others... as maybe you wil be doing the same thing withoout realising it..always be lenient and kind to others..you never know when you neeed themto be like that too.. even though you might be emotionally strong now and do not need it...


ok i guess i just written what i feel like saying at current since it just came... time for revision.. test tmr mcq though but well must do well......(i drop using hope to push myself to better limit you see.. at least for now..)